Being ask to be a best man is one hell of an honour – but little do you know what lies ahead of you.

After the initial shock and excitement fades away, there comes a point where you look ahead and try to gauge how long you have until the big day. In my instance I had over 500 days (no that’s not a typo) – initially I thought there was loads of time but my doesn’t time fly!

Now, you’ll start off cocky and if you’re not careful before you know it you’ll be the worst man, not the best man. So, to help all the lost souls out there my (very general but) handy guide, chronological guide below should help!

I’ll cover both the stag and the speech in two follow up posts.

  1. Celebrate being a best man – should be done at the moment of being asked
  2. Usually the first thing to come is suits, as this can be chosen early with fittings coming later – help the bride groom choose
  3. Also, help the groom choose the ushers should this be needed
  4. Be the liaison between the groom and the groomsmen
  5. Act as his PA for booking fittings etc.
  6. You’ll want to start looking to organising the stag around six months before the wedding
    1. If you’re going abroad it might be worth doing it sooner, bearing in mind people’s budgets and annual leave allowances
  7. With three months to go you should really start writing your speech (yes, three months sounds a lot, but you’ll wish you had longer)
  8. Around the same time you’ll go for your first suit fitting – make sure the colours and fit is spot on
  9. Get a present for the bride and groom
  10. With one month to goSTAG DO 
  11. Ensure all the ushers know their duties
  12. Keep practising your bloody speech
  13. No really, keep practising
  14. Don’t stop, over and over
  15. With one day to go it’s time for the last supper – final night as a ‘single man’
  16. Raise a toast to your groom

The big day…

This section needs describing a little better.

The groom is going to be bat shit scared, he might not admit it but you’ll be able to tell. Keep him calm and make sure HE knows you’ve got everything under control. Keep hold of that bloody ring and keep checking where you put it.

When you get to the wedding venue, make sure all ushers are present and ensure they know their roles. Also make them aware of special guests and arrangements.

You’ll be sat on the front right row, with the groom. In my case, everyone stood and faced the bride as she entered, apart from the groom. The best man’s role here was to make sure he knew when to turn around, a gentle nod will do it.

The registrar or vicar will call you up to present the bride’s ring to the groom – don’t mess this up!

After the wedding make sure to give the photographer a hand trying to get everyone together, you wouldn’t want to be in their position that’s for sure.

Mingle and talk to guests, introduce yourself and make yourself known.

When you get to the reception venue you’ll be part of the wedding party as guests are welcomed – but let’s face it, nobody wants to talk to you!

After an interlude – it’ll be time for food which is swiftly followed by the SPEECH. You’ll be bricking it by this point, along with the father of the bride – the groom’s biggest part has been and gone so his speech should be a doddle!

Try not to get too drunk pre-speech but dutch courage is fine though!

Rib the groom etc.

Dance the night away and don’t do anything silly…

Your job is done, my friend.

The Guy Guide: Be the Best Best Man